so that’s what makes it so

damn, january. enero. time to start all over again, again.
i am tired of new year's'es. they just keep coming and feeling less and less new each time. it's a tired old routine. i am a whiny old curmudgeon. Bah! screw you all for being alive! I hate puppies, kittens, and balloons!

just kidding. i am feeling gassy and sleepy. i am lighting things all day long and it's making me a little antsy. i have about another hour's worth to go and then i need to haul home and play bioshock all night (don't ask). I have been back two days and already feels like i never left town... it's nice to be back home of course, to deal with the ever-present business.. but still.. doesn't take away my need to actually have some kind of a relaxing vacation. that longed-for "getaway to escape it all." Damn it is thursday night (already), that means it's the first Beauty Bar of the 2008 right? No, it's been a little bit of a while, already... but I will hold off for a little while still, i guess.

the holidays are behind me and that's a good thing. holidays are alright but they are really all about running around and stressing over buying presents and wrapping presents and delivering presents and not messing up presents and being able to afford presents and avoiding crappy crowded shopping malls and insane santa clauses and really hungry and sad-looking homeless people with just one arm, half-passed-out by the freeway exit who it's increasingly hard to ignore these days. Yes, it puts things in perspective (the city is cold and hateful at times). We haven't many unsightly homeless folks in OC anyway (i guess they round them up and deposit them Downtown in the alleys). Anyway holidays = DONE and that's all good with me. I can sit back and let my coffers try to refill ever-so-slightly. Oh OKAY V-day is approaching but otherwise it's all quiet. Chill out Ron. Just chill out. My own personal holiday is fast approaching (g-r-o-a-n) but soon that will be past as well and then I can put that sadness out of my mind. I am tired of birthdays, tired I say! I think this is my last one where I can still feel even relatively CLOSE to (legally) feeling like a kid. Somewhat.

There's a lot of things bouncing around in my brain as usual. We got back back from Boston, the trip went alright and my folks and girlfriend all met for the first time, I am sure there'll be a little fallout from that but overall things went over as well as could be expected. Both camps seem to have been fairly respectable enough of one another with a minimum of faux paus being commited, so I can relax a bit (well, such as it is). I came into my office yesterday AM and there were no pink slips waiting for me on my desk so again, a further sigh of relief (sigh, sigh). No ticket on my car 'cause of streetcleaning. No blood in my stool. My throat is a little sore (and coughing up the occasional green goblin, but nothing too terrible) and I haven't yet weighed myself.. AND my apartment's not yet burned down. All is well with the world.

The weekend looms already and I can't believe it - tomorrow is really already Friday? My plans for the weekend are Nil, though I have plenty to occupy me work-wise, across the board. I bound back into the mode and there's heaps of thought and planning and much decision making to do, and already elbow-grease required of me. The weekend coming will not be any more relaxing, but that's fine as I am itching to find something new and worthwhile to wrap my workaholic/creative urges around.

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Lots of interesting thoughts pass through my head lately, and lamentably I haven't committed many of them to paper (err, to .doc form). Or perhaps, better for that. Anyway, I was thinking a few weeks ago, it might be kind of fun to be chased by a big truck. WHAT you ask, WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT THAT? Well just listen. I was making a round of the office park during a break at work, just as a big truck came through the drive, and sort of crept alongside me. It was slowly traversing the narrow thru-way, and I watched my step but also noted how constricted the powerful beast was. Yes, if it wanted to truly crush me, it could certainly have a difficult time. Being a small single pedestrain, I can easily outmaneuver such a vehicle - while it has me beat in speed and mass, I can quickly and easily change direction, and I am more adept at dealing with uneven terrain. So then - YES I think it would be sort of fun to be chased by a truck. It would be fun on a bike or maybe a skateboard as well, but for pure thrill I think on-foot would be ideal. There's always going to be that ever-present danger that you could blow it and get completely throttled by the thing, but if you are even the tiniest bit wily (and, environment is not too difficult to navigate) then it shouldn't bee too hard.

Now let's examine a little further for a moment, and then I will get off of this. A big open field - you win. This is the easiest situation. The truck can work up speed and charge you, but if you start darting out of the way even as he closes in, then he's screwed since he'll need to wide-turn to nail you. Doing so would compromise the truck-driver's control, and if he did pull such a move then he might flip his rig (mind you, all this time I have been talking about a HEAVY TRUCK, like tractor-trailer combo - of course smaller trucks could easily kill you). Anyway, a steep incline is also (usually) in the pedestrian's favor. But now if you have a closed-off environment, with gates and walls and fences and stuff? Now things get interesting. The ped could get cornered and flattened up against the wall. I am not even considering the fact that the truck WOULD NOT have to remain completely intact while killing the ped. Even so it would not be too difficult. Depending upon the abilities of the ped, they could possibly take advantage of the obstacles and trick their pursuer into trapping itself - but if the person was of average athletic ability, then the odds are not in their favor.

Anyway, so there's my Truck-Chasing Fantasy. Could make for an interesting videogame, I suppose, but really the true thrill would come from real life. Oh well, I'LL never try it..

This brings up another thought, Lion Chasing Exercises. I mean, exercising is boring, though one can get into the rhythm I suppose - but other than the motivation to increase one's fitness, what's the point? Now. if a LION was chasing after you, that would cause you to run, for REAL! I mean, if you chill out, you're just gonna get mauled (at best!) or eaten. Unlike the truck, the lion doesn't have to worry about carefully navigating the terrain, it can just run around and pounce on you, so long as it can catch up to you. You'll be so busy running and trying not to be caught, that you wouldn't have TIME to be bored - no one is bored when they are in danger of having their flesh ripped off and eaten! This is complicated, though - the lion is most likely faster and more agile than most people it could chase, I'd assume (tigers, more so). I don't know, you'd probably need a slower lion. How fast do bears run? Are there slow ones? Not lumbering bears, but like.. jogging bears? Those things are mean and will eat you, I suppose, but you don't really picture bears vaulting across the serengeti like you would a lion or some other big cat. Anyway, a really good way to get in shape, but only for short bursts, because sooner or later you would probably end up getting caught and eaten, so I think I will pass on this as well.

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Well, I should end this by relating my very disturbing dream from last night. Honestly I don't really like to bring it up since it was pretty unsettling, but it's interesting to go back and read this stuff down the road as I tend to forget some of my weirder dreams. If you are squeamish and don't like to read upsetting things, you might wanna skip the rest of the blog entry -- Anyway I had this long and involved dream last night, I forgot about 95 percent of what went on, but I seem to recall a lot of running around and drama and all of that. Not very happy, just busy and trying to take care of all of my business, that sort of thing. In so doing, I got really neglectful of my house (in my dream, I owned a house with a pool). For the most part, things looked fine (and I made sure, usually, to keep it that way) but there were some things that were a little much for me to keep tabs on.. specifically, the pool. I didn't really WANT this pool, but they sold it to me and it had this whole weird Food Generation System which really creeped be out (it would use algae that grew in the pool and convert it into an edible food source somehow). I didn't really want to deal with all the maintainence involved as getting my food that way just seemed kind of gross, so I sort of ignored it and let the automatic pool maintainence device process and clean (and supposedly eliminate) all that stuff. Also it functioned as a Pet Care system, you'd put your pet into a small long tube that connected to the Food Cleaning/Distribution system and it would relieve you of the duties of caring for the thing. Not that I would ever do this in real life, of course, for anything above say.. a fish or reptile, but in my dream it was designed for dogs and cats and things. I examined the tube, not remembering if I even HAD a pet (or knowing what it even was!) and wondering how it was doing being sustained in there. I pulled back the sealed-off portion to view down the tube, which still would maintain a barrier between outside and inside, and looked to see what was down there. Something small and furry scurried down to my end, as the pool deposited the "food" there and it must have been feeding time - to my horror, I realized this was some kind of rodent. Not quite the cat, dog or hamster I was expecting, but some "unclean creature" which had thrived inside the pool system. It devoured the food as I watched it's short pointy tail spiking up and down - and I realized that this was not just a rodent but some bizarre unnatural nutated creature, at that. It looked very much like a rat, but it had extra sets of eyes on it's head - normal rat eyes, two big saucer-looking eyes on top of those, and weird Giger-esque squinty alien eyes alongside it's head - and no pupils (of course!) Disgusted, and horrified, I tried to close the viewing chamber (we were still separated by a plastic barrier, but it was not sealed to the air) and I wondered if this thing had actually EATEN whatever pet I tried to house in that horrible tube. As I tried to close the barrier, the rat effortlessly detoryed the plastic partition and freed itself from the tube, then fell to the floor and scampered into the backdoor of my house.. followed by several of it's bretheren. Anyway, I was about to start panicking when my eyes shot open and I woke suddenly from the nightmare, kind of sickened but happy it was not reality. Snapped out of it and got ready for work. So yeah, good day!