yes and no pt 2

sigh. another weekend spent in the office. i actually was planning to let my hair down this weekend.. guess it's not to be.

there's something to be said about next-generation technology. we get all psyched because "ohhh ohh look at all the things we had to do before to make things look nice, we now have all this POWER to play with and we can do so much more - everything will be easier!!!" Well bullshit, with the extra power comes "oh look how much higher quality we can make everything, let's skirt realism less and work that much harder to make things even more detailed!" Yeah, so it is and has always been, and little changes in that situation. Anyway, that's why i am in on weekends, ever.

bitching about work aside, things are alright. i would not say i am in a particularly wonderful mood lately, but at least things are better than they were months ago. i still like working here, and everything else in my immediate circle is going according to plan. i will be happy when i pass some forthcoming milestones in my life though. as usual i am trying to keep mellow these days, i have not been partying much... at all.. and just trying to keep out of trouble and save up some money. it always feels like that takes so long to do! I feel like i wish i could lock my personality in a time capsule while my work-self just chugged through a couple of years, just to even everything out. sometimes it almost feels like that's how it goes -

to be honest, a little bit lately i have been reminiscing about the truly weirder times in my life, like when i was newer to LA and much stupider about many things in general. i do miss that energy, even with the weird drama i was going through. it was just new and exciting. nothing really has felt new and exciting in a way i have wanted it to for awhile - i guess you become familiar with the same basic things in your life, overall, after awhile and as you get older, you kind of just bond with that. yeah, here i go talking like an old guy - you get settled into your patterns. what you eat, what type of things you do for fun, what types of movies you watch, books you read. getting older is all about less experimentation and more like going with what you know, don't take chances - don't waste your time! okay, so i am having some problems dealing with being 30.

halfway to 60.

1/3 to 90.

So don't worry, I am absolutely sure I will not live 'till 90. But I digress.

I think I will cheer up when I wrap up this level and have some cool work behind me to feel proud of, at least.. cleaning up my apartment would help too.

don't mind me. i am just whiny because i am unwrapping a sofa for the last hour and change.